Yesterday I did my 2nd speaking engagement, this time in beautiful Southampton (on Lake Huron) for a wonderful bunch of women.
Being nervous I made a little joke about swimming being a fairly quiet sport and hence not being a great speaker, afterwards one of the woman said to me "don't ever put down your speaking skills again, you moved me" ~ probably one of the biggest boosts I've received in awhile. Another woman told me that was the 1st time she recalled the speaker getting a standing ovation. It was really awesome to have these women express this to me.
Public speaking will probably never be easy for me, but somehow I think doing the swim crossing helps give me the confidence to even try doing things like this. It is really enjoyable to get such reactions!
Here's my speech:
On Aug 12 2011, I did something I won’t soon forget,,, I touched a rock.
Being nervous I made a little joke about swimming being a fairly quiet sport and hence not being a great speaker, afterwards one of the woman said to me "don't ever put down your speaking skills again, you moved me" ~ probably one of the biggest boosts I've received in awhile. Another woman told me that was the 1st time she recalled the speaker getting a standing ovation. It was really awesome to have these women express this to me.
Public speaking will probably never be easy for me, but somehow I think doing the swim crossing helps give me the confidence to even try doing things like this. It is really enjoyable to get such reactions!
Here's my speech:
On Aug 12 2011, I did something I won’t soon forget,,, I touched a rock.
Now don’t all look at Hilary and wonder “who is this crazy person you brought in to talk today?” The rock was pretty big…
In fact, it was a rock on the shoreline of Lake Ontario in the town of Oakville, nothing out of the ordinary, except that it was the 1st dry-land I had touched in over 18 hours since I left the shore in Port Dalhousie, swimming.
Although nobody ever swims in open water straight, the straight-line distance from point-to-point is 42km or 26 miles (a running marathon).
I swam without a wetsuit abiding by traditional open water swimming rules, even though I knew that Lake Ontario waters can become frigid much faster than I could swim that distance.
I started at mid-night, swimming in the dark and waves, alone in the water, with a dingy beside me lit up with glow-sticks as if it was Christmas.
Only after daybreak was I allowed to have what we call a “pacer” join me in the water to swim beside me. I would rotate through a hand-full of pacers I had selected for my crew. These pacers were to provide me with some company and keep me motivated in the middle of the lake where seeing only water for miles can deprives the senses.
I was not allowed any physical contact with the pacers or the boats. Eating and drinking was therefore done while I treaded water or floated.
Now you are just looking at me with that look “who is this crazy person?”
As soon as I started mentioning this goal, almost a year prior to it, I started to see these looks. My mom when I told her probably wondered if letting me swim so much as a youth had actually waterlogged some brain-cells.
Yes swimming 42km, for over 18 hours is kind of crazy. But I think it is good to be a bit crazy, if that’s what it takes to push your own boundaries. If you aren’t crazy enough to wonder what is beyond your perceived limits, you won’t ever reach beyond them.
But of course, once you’ve thought up some crazy idea, it’s best to go about making it happen in a logical way.
I really had no idea what was involved besides swimming for a long time and having some experience with the conditions I may face in Lake Ontario.
As it turns out, just organizing a Lake Ontario crossing is also a big challenge. Solo Swims of Ontario, who sanction all the solo marathon crossings in Ontario, require each aspirant to find 4 boats to accompany them.
These boats each needed a crew, plus I had to gather medical staff, lifeguards and pacers. Then of course I needed to feed my team and ensure they all have transportation to the start and from the finish. All this probably meant I would need to do some soliciting of sponsors and fundraising to cover some of the costs. Where would I begin…?
The initial research into my idea was a bit overwhelming. But instead of giving up on it right at the beginning, I decided to get some more insight by being on the crew of another aspirant’s crossing the year before my attempt.
SO, ironically I became the “chef” on Miguel’s crew. You’d understand the humour in that if you’d ever tasted my cooking, but I said I’d do anything for an opportunity to see first-hand what I was contemplating getting myself into with this crazy dream and his crew wasn’t expecting anything gourmet, right?
From this experience, I gained valuable insight into the process and organization and since Miguel was successful in his crossing, being part of his crew also provided inspiration for me.
The other really smart thing I did was ask my friend Fiona Lowden to be the manager for my crossing. Her organizational skills and outgoing and friendly personality would be invaluable in recruiting boats and crew, fundraising and the overall organization of the crossing. She really put my mind to rest on the organizational challenges…so I could concentrate on the biggest physical & mental tasks I’d ever decided to face.
With all this on my plate, at times, questions about whether I could achieve my goal would swim through my mind.
I think it is only natural, if you dare to dream big, to have moments of doubt…
But in moments when you question your sanity or fear your chances of success, remind yourself that courage is in the effort, not the outcome and that you are living your dream!
People often think of courage as the absence of fear, but true courage is standing up to your fears and attempting feats in the face of them.
In one newspaper article a few weeks before my swim I was quoted as saying “my biggest fear is of letting people down if I don’t succeed”. A stranger emailed me because based on this comment, he thought my attitude would lead me to failure.
But in my opinion being unsuccessful in making a dream come true would not be a failure, as long as you have given a substantial, significant effort to reach for your dream.
I think it is only natural, if you dare to dream big, to have moments of doubt…
But in moments when you question your sanity or fear your chances of success, remind yourself that courage is in the effort, not the outcome and that you are living your dream!
People often think of courage as the absence of fear, but true courage is standing up to your fears and attempting feats in the face of them.
In one newspaper article a few weeks before my swim I was quoted as saying “my biggest fear is of letting people down if I don’t succeed”. A stranger emailed me because based on this comment, he thought my attitude would lead me to failure.
But in my opinion being unsuccessful in making a dream come true would not be a failure, as long as you have given a substantial, significant effort to reach for your dream.
This is particularly true in open water swimming where the many variables needed for success are out of ones’ control and the outcome is as much up to Mother Nature.
I emailed the gentleman back thanking him for his concern but explaining my position and the newspaper comment. I included a quote from a book I read about some swimmers who were trying to make the Olympic team: the coach says to them “To make this is going to be so sweet, to fail will be disappointing. Either way, it is going to be painful, but the experience of a lifetime, and life will go on. But those who strive, those who leave nothing on the table, those who will take the risk, will all be winners. Life is truly sweeter for those who truly live it. The world belongs, and will always belong, to the people who participate. Don't stand on the outside, take a risk, you might fail, but you will understand the beauty of each breath of life. So don’t feel sorry for those who fail, feel sorry for the majority that never participate. They’ll just never understand, let alone feel, all that life can and should be.”
My mom recently told me that this quote really helped her deal with the worry of the mental effect on me if I was unable to finish the crossing.
All I could do was my best on the things I could control and I would have to take the risk, and hope for the best on the elements I couldn’t control but without trying there was absolutely no chance of making my dream come true!
Not only that, but acknowledging there is a chance of not succeeding is not weakness. Instead this acknowledgement is necessary in order to make a solid plan to combat the risks.
When you experience fear, the goal is not to ignore it or just banish it from thought, rather, it is to master the fear, by facing it, dealing with it, learning how to handle it and then you can actually put the fear behind you.
The potential for cold water for my Lake Ontario swim was intimidating for me and seemingly out of my control.
By admitting this early, I was able to make a training plan to reduce the risks that cold water could be my undoing.
It was fun eating anything I wanted, to put on some extra insulation.
But let me tell you, even though I used visualization techniques to image the sun on my back and to pretend I was swimming in the tropics, it wasn’t easy or very enjoyable getting in some pretty damn cold water to work on acclimatizing to it…
But I had to step outside my comfort zone and do what I needed to do in order to better the odds of success.
This cold water training was facing my fear.
And the more experience I got in cold water, the more confidence I gained in an area I previously thought of as a weakness for myself.
If I was faced with cold water on crossing day I knew I could say, "I've trained in these conditions, I know I can handle it"
Experiencing my body learning to adapt to cold water was pretty cool (pun intended) and reinforced my belief that you can push your body to do some pretty amazing things!
When you experience fear, the goal is not to ignore it or just banish it from thought, rather, it is to master the fear, by facing it, dealing with it, learning how to handle it and then you can actually put the fear behind you.
The potential for cold water for my Lake Ontario swim was intimidating for me and seemingly out of my control.
By admitting this early, I was able to make a training plan to reduce the risks that cold water could be my undoing.
It was fun eating anything I wanted, to put on some extra insulation.
But let me tell you, even though I used visualization techniques to image the sun on my back and to pretend I was swimming in the tropics, it wasn’t easy or very enjoyable getting in some pretty damn cold water to work on acclimatizing to it…
But I had to step outside my comfort zone and do what I needed to do in order to better the odds of success.
This cold water training was facing my fear.
And the more experience I got in cold water, the more confidence I gained in an area I previously thought of as a weakness for myself.
If I was faced with cold water on crossing day I knew I could say, "I've trained in these conditions, I know I can handle it"
Experiencing my body learning to adapt to cold water was pretty cool (pun intended) and reinforced my belief that you can push your body to do some pretty amazing things!
The physical preparation for swimming over 42k was part of my life for every day for over a year. The day to day training is the hardest part, but it was important to me to enjoy the whole process of reaching for my dream.
When I decided my Lake Ontario dream was a goal I would pursue, I vowed to myself that no matter what the final outcome turned out to be, the whole progression would be an adventure.
The journey, the path can be just as beautiful as the destination!
I was determined to take in all the scenery along the route! As I wouldn’t be taking this trip again! ~ I’m not that insane!
I had to do the day to day training to get where I wanted to go, so I might as well enjoy it as I did it!
Every stroke, every day, every swim was part of the voyage.
During the winter I spent many hours in the pool going back and forth, often by myself. It could be lonely and monotonous sometimes. But I always tried to appreciate that I was able to do something I loved, even when I didn’t feel like doing it some-days. I kept my love and joy of water in the back of my mind to help get me through it.
If you remember that you are living your dream, following your passion, you find a way to enjoy the day to day, and I believe you have a better chance of toughing it out through the difficult days by keeping your original reasons for your dream, in mind at all times.
Yes the training was painful sometimes – make that a lot of the time; but I made pain my ally!
I realized that pain from pushing myself meant I was working hard and aggressively pursuing my goal.
It was the process of reaching for a dream, the day to day training, surpassing limitations, finding the strength to endure the pain and sacrifices - that was the real accomplishment...
It’s not one defining moment that makes you strong; it’s all of the little moments combined.
When I decided my Lake Ontario dream was a goal I would pursue, I vowed to myself that no matter what the final outcome turned out to be, the whole progression would be an adventure.
The journey, the path can be just as beautiful as the destination!
I was determined to take in all the scenery along the route! As I wouldn’t be taking this trip again! ~ I’m not that insane!
I had to do the day to day training to get where I wanted to go, so I might as well enjoy it as I did it!
Every stroke, every day, every swim was part of the voyage.
During the winter I spent many hours in the pool going back and forth, often by myself. It could be lonely and monotonous sometimes. But I always tried to appreciate that I was able to do something I loved, even when I didn’t feel like doing it some-days. I kept my love and joy of water in the back of my mind to help get me through it.
If you remember that you are living your dream, following your passion, you find a way to enjoy the day to day, and I believe you have a better chance of toughing it out through the difficult days by keeping your original reasons for your dream, in mind at all times.
Yes the training was painful sometimes – make that a lot of the time; but I made pain my ally!
I realized that pain from pushing myself meant I was working hard and aggressively pursuing my goal.
It was the process of reaching for a dream, the day to day training, surpassing limitations, finding the strength to endure the pain and sacrifices - that was the real accomplishment...
It’s not one defining moment that makes you strong; it’s all of the little moments combined.
Helping to raise awareness about the environmental issues facing Lake Ontario also helped give additional purpose to putting in the required time and making the necessary sacrifices. My fundraising for Lake Ontario WaterkeeperS naturally connected with the whole idea to swim across the lake. I grew up in Hamilton and when I was young, no one would ever swim in the lake there. Even though the lake was in my own back yard, my source of drinking water, I didn’t give it all that much thought, until about 5 years ago when I became involved with a swim group who would get together for little swims in the lake. At first people thought I’d get sick or grow a third eye, but instead it was just the lake that grew on me. Enough to eventually think I could spend enough time in it to cross it.
Swimming in the lake is refreshing; being part of nature, in a big body of water is humbling. I hope you people here in Southampton have experienced some of these feelings about your Great Lake.
As I spent more time in the lake, I realized that my activity in it made me care about it more.
Lake Ontario Waterkeeper encourages people to take to the water, swimming, boating and fishing, to get connected with it, I now understood why. They actively fight for Lake Ontario and I was very happy to raise money for them through my crossing.
Finally open water swim season came and I welcomed the change of scenery from the black line on the bottom of the pool to the great outdoors. It was wonderful to freshen up the routine and get back to nature.
But open water brought other issues:
For safety, swimming in Lake Ontario required having someone there to watch over me. So I did my long weekend swim practice in Lake Ontario with my husband Bill along side me in the kayak but during the week I would go to a small local watering hole that had no boat traffic and where I could swim close to shore the whole time safely on my own.
This schedule was working well until I got chicken pox like bumps from being in this small lake. I learned these were caused by parasites found in smaller warmer bodies of water that had burrowed under my skin and then died, leaving me with itchy red bumps all over. Yuck!
Needless to say, I moved all my open water training into Lake Ontario after 2 bouts of that. I originally thought of the added difficulty of re-organizing my training and finding people to watch over me, as an inconvenience, but then I realized it was more enjoyable to get family, friends and even strangers involved and out enjoying Lake Ontario with me and in fact I was getting people more interested in the lake too.
I connected with a local kayak club and over the summer, on 5 different occasions, kayakers who were accompanying me got tipped by the waves, really getting them in the Lake with me and providing me with some giggles too.
Also a bunch of my crew and my daughter Cadence went swimming in Lake Ontario for their very 1st time during my training. Sharing my love for the lake with them is very special part of this journey. I have some great memories on Lake Ontario before I even left the shore in Port Dalhousie.
For safety, swimming in Lake Ontario required having someone there to watch over me. So I did my long weekend swim practice in Lake Ontario with my husband Bill along side me in the kayak but during the week I would go to a small local watering hole that had no boat traffic and where I could swim close to shore the whole time safely on my own.
This schedule was working well until I got chicken pox like bumps from being in this small lake. I learned these were caused by parasites found in smaller warmer bodies of water that had burrowed under my skin and then died, leaving me with itchy red bumps all over. Yuck!
Needless to say, I moved all my open water training into Lake Ontario after 2 bouts of that. I originally thought of the added difficulty of re-organizing my training and finding people to watch over me, as an inconvenience, but then I realized it was more enjoyable to get family, friends and even strangers involved and out enjoying Lake Ontario with me and in fact I was getting people more interested in the lake too.
I connected with a local kayak club and over the summer, on 5 different occasions, kayakers who were accompanying me got tipped by the waves, really getting them in the Lake with me and providing me with some giggles too.
Also a bunch of my crew and my daughter Cadence went swimming in Lake Ontario for their very 1st time during my training. Sharing my love for the lake with them is very special part of this journey. I have some great memories on Lake Ontario before I even left the shore in Port Dalhousie.
Finally, I will skip ahead and take just a few more minutes to share with you a true story about the power of attitude:
After countless hours of trudging through the water, through darkness, chop and aches that started earlier into the swim then I had hoped I had been able to stay positive,… BUT with about 15 hundred meters left (less then 4% of the total distance to go) I hit a strong current which washed away my positive attitude.
The shore, my goal, was clearly in sight, but it wasn’t getting closer, in fact I was certain I was sometimes going backwards…
The negative thoughts crashed in on me: “I’m not strong enough; I’m too tired to battle this”.
This attitude had me thinking that trying to finish through the current was “useless torture”
I almost threw in the towel.
In fact, I closed my eyes to let myself go to sleep, just wanting to just be pulled from the water.
But thankfully my mind wouldn’t shut-off or shut -up:
“Mel you are fighting a current, not a terminal illness;
No one’s ever physically abused you, except yourself;
That’s right, YOU chose this challenge,
How lucky are you that this is the hardest thing you’ve ever encountered"
…these thoughts made the negative ones seem so stupid…
After countless hours of trudging through the water, through darkness, chop and aches that started earlier into the swim then I had hoped I had been able to stay positive,… BUT with about 15 hundred meters left (less then 4% of the total distance to go) I hit a strong current which washed away my positive attitude.
The shore, my goal, was clearly in sight, but it wasn’t getting closer, in fact I was certain I was sometimes going backwards…
The negative thoughts crashed in on me: “I’m not strong enough; I’m too tired to battle this”.
This attitude had me thinking that trying to finish through the current was “useless torture”
I almost threw in the towel.
In fact, I closed my eyes to let myself go to sleep, just wanting to just be pulled from the water.
But thankfully my mind wouldn’t shut-off or shut -up:
“Mel you are fighting a current, not a terminal illness;
No one’s ever physically abused you, except yourself;
That’s right, YOU chose this challenge,
How lucky are you that this is the hardest thing you’ve ever encountered"
…these thoughts made the negative ones seem so stupid…
By now, all the pacers had jumped in the water with me to keep me awake.
My pacers who included my good friends and my husband, were by my side and I let myself believe they were in there supporting me because they believed I still had the strength to keep going…
My amazing team helped pull me out of my own mental darkness and gave me the power to start to bring my positive attitude back.
My pacers who included my good friends and my husband, were by my side and I let myself believe they were in there supporting me because they believed I still had the strength to keep going…
My amazing team helped pull me out of my own mental darkness and gave me the power to start to bring my positive attitude back.
They stuffed mini Reese chocolate peanut butter cups in my mouth. When during a swim workout do you ever get to pig out on your favorite food?... Sweet! I felt more positive…
I was told they could hear the people cheering for me on shore… more positive still…
In advance I had told people that I estimated it would take me 15-21 hours...I looked at the sky, the sun hadn't set, so although I didn’t know the time, I knew I wasn’t swimming beyond the upper time limits of what I had chosen to put myself through.
With this awareness and a rebuilt positive attitude I made a conscious decision to try for at least that long.
I wasn't certain if I could make enough forward progress to make it to shore in the current, but I was positive I could keep trying some more!
I dug deep within myself, I thought of all the positive outcomes already achieved on my journey, the fundraising, all the support and generosity I had been shown, the fun on the lake we had; I used all the positive thoughts to push on!
I eventually saw the people on shore; then it was shallow enough to see the bottom of the Lake and finally, after an incredible and long 18 hour journey across Lake Ontario, I touched a rock!
A rock has never felt so amazing or overwhelming, but the rock just physically embodied the whole process of getting to it.
I know everyone is not going to swim across a Lake, but everyone should feel this someday, so find a crazy dream, take the risk, push yourself through your own personal cold waters, enjoy the process, raise awareness for a cause you believe in, get your family and friends involved, fight off the negatives and find the positives, give it your all and keep reaching for your Rock!!
Thank you for your interest.
I’ve got a video that one of my pacers made for me, which I feel captures the challenge, but also the fun we all had, and the massive support system I had.
